When you practice the love of Agape, you have discovered the secret to finding true love because the love of Agape is love based on the principles of what is right and for the good of your spouse and marriage.
Agape Love is not just an emotion, but it is a principle by which we deliberately live, if applied, a couple’s connection to relationship happiness.
That is, it is a code of conduct that governs the way we treat a wife or husband. We make up our minds to look for the best for him or her so when emotional emotions come and go, this love stays because it is a mental decision.
When Agape’s husband practices love he provides guidance for his family – emotionally, physically, financially and spiritually. He continues to honor his wife in a loving way even as he faces marital challenges by exercising patience, kindness, understanding and prophecy.
Wives provide financially and emotionally for the family and in addition, it is the engine that supports the family arrangement that shows respect and esteem for her husband as the two work together as one.
Let’s look at a few principles:
“Quit before the controversy breaks out”.There are no perfect marriages. Disagreements will arise from time to time. How should they be handled? Ask yourself: “Do I exercise self-control to restrain my tongue? It is much better to discuss disagreements as they arise than to allow them to build up until they reach explosive proportions.
It always seems to be worse than it really is. Discuss it now or forget it. Is it just a passing statement? Let it pass. Does it need to be discussed? Has your friend done something to upset you?
Do not sharply criticize; try to raise the point in question, or make a suggestion that will open it up for discussion. For example, you could say: ‘Honey, there’s something I don’t understand. Could you help me? ‘Then listen. Try to understand the other person’s point of view.
Do you see how practicing this principle can stop marital fights?
“There is one who speaks sympathetically as with a sword stab, but the tongue of the wise is a remedy.” Before you speak, do you stop and think what effect your words will have on your friend?
“Where there is no wood the fire goes out”. Can you stop arguing, or do you have to have the last word?
“Don’t let the sun set you in a state of excitement.” Do you rely on differences and thus increase the misery for you and your friend? Who is to blame when something goes wrong? That is not important. What is important is how things can be put right. Be flexible, air differences, speak them out, and don’t be too serious about yourself. Communicate!
In the final analysis, a happy marriage is not achieved by relying on our own thinking or by selfishly seeking our own desires. We find true family happiness only by acting on principles specifically designed for husband and wife.
Work within the arrangement and your marriage will be a success. This is the secret of how to stop marital fights for good!