Are you avoiding going home so that you will not have another argument with your girlfriend or wife? Always walking on egg shells? Every little thing turns into another big fight that seems like nothing?
Welcome to the world of having a relationship with an unhappy woman. Contrary to what you might be thinking, most of the arguments are irrelevant. She’s not picking a fight because you put that dirty bag on the counter, she’s picking a fight because she is unhappy with you and the relationship and every little thing bothers her. If she was happy and content, she would polish every little thing she respects now, just as she did in the beginning of the relationship.
The first act is not to get your girlfriend or wife to argue about what she is complaining about. Remember, her argument doesn’t matter, she’s about it her feelings about the relationship. Let her make her complaints out while you stand firm and unresponsive. At that point, she just wants to be heard, she doesn’t want you to argue with her. If you try to argue in a logical way or tell her that she is exaggerating, it will only surprise her more, since she will feel that you are not listening to her feelings. Again, remember, she just wants to be heard, what she is arguing is not about her.
After you let it dump it all, then you can react in one of several ways.
1. Thank you for sharing her feelings with you, or
2. Give her a big hug of understanding
You will be able to say which is more appropriate. If combined, adhere to option # 1.
At that point, she most likely went down because she let out her anger and will be quieter after you admit her feelings. At that point, switch the conversation away from what she was joking about and ask her how she feels about the relationship and what you can do to make her feel better.
If you deal with this properly, it will start to open up and you will start to see what was in all the arguments Seriously about.
Remember guys, don’t fight fire with fire when it comes to women. You never won. Women want to be understood and heard. Her complaints stem from her feelings about the relationship. Give her a chance to ventilate and then redirect the conversation towards finding the true cause of the dissatisfaction.